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On Thursday’s episode of the Amy Robach and T.J. Holmes’ I Do, Half 2 podcast, The Girls Subsequent Door alum recalled how her experience throughout the Playboy Mansion influenced her perspective on intimacy, revealing that she nonetheless struggles with it instantly.

Wilkinson, 39, lived on the Playboy Mansion from 2004 to 2009, the place she was actually certainly one of Hugh Hefner’s girlfriends alongside Holly Madison and Bridget Marquardt, which was confirmed on The Girls Subsequent Door.

When Holmes requested how her years throughout the Playboy mansion “type[ed] what you thought a relationship was, should be, and the form of particular person even you had been eager on?” Wilkinson acknowledged, “Look, I wrestle nonetheless to these days with my relationships and my views on intercourse.”

“I wanted to endure numerous treatment, they normally checked out me they normally’re like — that’s the major time I’m admitting this — nonetheless they’re like, ‘You would possibly want slightly bit little little bit of a intercourse draw back. You could have slightly bit little little bit of a problem when it comes to contemplating of intercourse,’” she continued.

After Robach pressed on what she meant by a “intercourse draw back,” Wilkinson acknowledged, “You perceive, it’s merely unhealthy concepts. Most likely not settling for a marriage and stuff like that — which isn’t, I might not say unhealthy — I’m saying that everyone has their choices, and some of us wanna be single, some of us wanna be married … and I’m further of a satisfying idea kind of particular person.”

The true property agent was solely 18 when she moved into the Playboy Mansion, and left at 23 after she met Hank Baskett. The two subsequently tied the knot and welcomed son Hank, 15, and daughter, Alijah, 10, sooner than the couple minimize up and divorced in 2018.

Wanting once more, Wilkinson often known as her marriage “the happiest days of my full life,” and recalled the devastation that ensued when she and Baskett minimize up.

“Nowadays had been the happiest days of my life. And so when lately obtained right here to an end, I crumbled so exhausting, and it practically killed me,” she admitted. “It practically killed me.”

“I left the Playboy Mansion at age 23, acquired pregnant, acquired married on the age of 23, then started my life as a partner and a mother, and it was the golden years of my life,” she added.

The mom of two went on to look once more at her option to go away her life on the Playboy Mansion behind.

“It was the exact timing. I found myself so bored on the Playboy Mansion. I was equivalent to, ‘I’m ready to go away this place. I’m ready to begin out a family,” Wilkinson recalled. “I’m ready for the … lifestyle: My kids go to a tremendous school. I’m a soccer mom. I’m a softball mom. I’m a basketball mom. I was ready for that. I manifested it, and it obtained right here to me, and I met the proper man, the individual of my objectives.”

“Even though we’re divorced, he’s the daddy of my kids, and he’s basically essentially the most excellent father to my kids, and I do know I chosen correct with him,” she added of Baskett.

Holmes reacted to Wilkinsin’s reward of her ex-husband, questioning why they aren’t nonetheless collectively if her reminiscences of their marriage are so optimistic. In response, Wilkinson acknowledged she and Baskett made “too many” errors, noting that they’d been so “youthful,” sooner than together with that their errors resulted of their marriage not being “repairable at a positive degree.”

Nonetheless, she did admit that she’ll “always be in love” collectively together with her ex-husband.

“It takes two of us to be in a relationship … and when one particular person changes their minds on love and marriage, that’s how easy it’s for it to disintegrate. So, I’ll always, always want my family once more collectively,” Wilkinson acknowledged. “I’ll always want that. So, till the day I die. I have no idea if I’ve one different chance at marriage with that man or not. I’ll always
want my kids to have these two mom and father collectively. Nonetheless, sadly, that could be a fantasy, .”

“It sounds akin to you’re nonetheless in love with Hank,” Robach acknowledged, to which Wilkinson replied, “I’ll always be in love with Hank.”

“Errors are errors,” she continued. “All of us make errors. I’ve made my errors … nonetheless love gained’t ever go away. And whether it is precise love, you’re gonna put your delight aside and need the right for the alternative particular person. And I want the right for the alternative particular person so badly. … There isn’t any need for bitterness, and there isn’t any need for toxicity.”

“By the use of these ultimate six years, I’ve accomplished so much treatment,” she added. “I’ve gone to the hospital for seven days to easily reprogram my contemplating, and I did that, and it truly labored. So I’m now residing throughout the state of peace of ideas. You perceive, I’m on good meds. I’m merely in a extraordinarily good place.”

Wilkinson went on to current an substitute on her current love life.

“I’ve nothing. I’d dabble into some intercourse sometimes — nonetheless thus far and be in a relationship? That’s the longest farfetched issue I would presumably actually really feel in the intervening time,” Wilkinson outlined. “I’m in a bachelorette-type of vibe correct now.”

Nonetheless, she shared that she does have some prospects. “I do have two very youthful, engaging, ex-NFL players which might be, like, all up on me correct now, and it makes me actually really feel youthful,” Wilkinson acknowledged.